Tour of Sufferlandria 2015

Last year, I attempted to do the Tour of Sufferlandria for the first time. I failed at completing it, miserably. In retrospect, I failed to recover properly from Ironman Cozumel.

This year, no Ironman to recover from, and I've been doing 1 or 2 of the Sufferfest videos for the prior 7 weeks. And I sort of tapered this week--while I did some tempo running on Wednesday, I cut back my long run from 2 hours to 1:30, and ran it super easy on Friday.

In scheduling training for next week, where the Tour is in full swing, I've noted that all running and swimming is optional. I will swim tomorrow morning, and I have one more swim planned, but if I'm dying by Wednesday, I will skip it. Any running will be super easy, Zone 1 stuff.

Yesterday, the Tour kicked off with an easy video, Elements of Style, followed by The Long Scream. The Long Scream is a :30 Time Trial! Well, I'm still a triathlete and not just a cyclist, so I ran :25 before I hopped on the bike. The run was to be easy, and I went outside and had actually a pretty damn good run for going easy! I averaged 8:58/mile, in part because I saw the girls' cross country team running towards me for about 1/2 mile so I had to look good for them! But I also know that because I ran so easy Friday that I was able to go faster than I needed to.

Elements of Style was fun, and it made me realize I need to focus more on engaging my left calf muscles. I'm right-handed, and very right-body dominant, and my left knee is the one missing the ACL. My right calf is always more gnarly than the left one after biking, so maybe I can work on that. Then The Long Scream. Fuck. I forgot it was a TT. Now, many of the people doing the Tour are just biking or haven't been training a lot, unlike me. So I am doing the Tour rides as "best effort." I'm still putting forth a really strong effort, but typically I'm riding one zone lower than they are asking for some of the time. Still, I knew I'd ridden hard when I got off the bike and my legs felt like jello, and I disconnected my laptop from the TV and then yelled FUCK OFF at the TV as if that would turn it off!

But I didn't feel too badly, because I'd drunk a Coke before I ran, and I drank Infinit (with CAFFEINE!) on the bike. I'd planned a :30 swim after. I've been doing a :30 or so swim on Sundays after my long run, and I did one Friday after it, and wanted to do one to recover from the biking. I started drinking the Endurox R4 after I got off the bike just to keep some calories going in, and also a big glass of water.

I got to the pool, put on my flippers, took a big gulp of Endurox R4, and swam 1500 straight! I don't know what possessed me, but I felt good and didn't feel bored by swimming straight (and fairly easy). The power of caffeine! I finished up with 200 kick and got out and showered, and then went into the sauna to stretch a bit. As soon as I laid down in there I was like FUCK I'M HUNGRY, but I managed about 5 minutes of stretching. I don't expect to be too hungry after just 2:15 of working out (the total for yesterday), but I was. When I got home, I had another 1/2 chicken breast fricassee leftover, and on Friday I'd made about 8 cups of brown rice in my rice cooker, so I scooped out about 1 1/4 cups of rice into the bowl, microwaved it and ate it standing up in the kitchen because I was so damn hungry. And I cracked a beer, since I'd already drunk my recovery beverage!

And then I realized I was pretty tired. I was going to immediately go to the grocery store, but my body said LAY THE FUCK DOWN. So I did. I needed some more calories so I grabbed a small handful of jelly beans and ate them in bed watching whatever was on TV. After about 45 minutes, I motivated and went grocery shopping, and luckily I hadn't planned anything for the day, because the rest of it basically consisted of laying around doing nothing. Which I need from time to time.

I had the filet part of a huge porterhouse steak and a giant salad for dinner and another beer, then I had a generous shot of this stuff and passed out pretty early.

As I sit here writing this my legs don't feel too bad, but today's Tour stage is Blender. 1:40 of you want to kill someone. But that's all that's on my schedule today aside from maybe a little snow shoveling.

Next week, the Tour includes about 9 1/2 hours of riding. While I do that much many times during the summer preparing for an Ironman, um...the Tour intensity is just over the top. Still, my objective is to finish the damn thing this time, even if I have to tone down the intensity. Last year, I was toast on Friday. I'm sure I will be hurting badly by then, but I hope not enough to quit! I am going to mix up 11 bottles of Infinit for the biking and my alleged long run. There is no way I can get through all this without caffeine!

Huge props to anyone who does this and finishes it. It is not your average week of biking! If you think you train hard and have never done one of these videos, then you are delusional. These videos are the real deal and aren't intended for daily use! That's why this is such a fun thing to do in January!

Good luck to all Tour contenders, this is going to be epic!

A Day in the Life, Part II

Continuation of yesterday:

5:40AM Drive to the Y to run. Towel Nazi is not at the front desk, so I'm able to score 2 towels so I can actually dry off after I shower.
5:50AM I'm on the treadmill. I brought a can of Coke with me and a bottle of Gatorade. My stomach isn't right from the coffee, and I'm thinking it's going to be mostly Coke. Suprisingly, my legs do not feel too bad, although the Zone 1 shit feels waaaaay too slow. There are an awful lot of smiley, morning workout people at the Y. 25% of them recognize me.
6:20AM Time to start Zone 2. It still feels slow, but not that bad. I'm able to take sips of Gatorade now, although periodically I want to gag and puke anyway.
6:50AM 1 hour down, I get to--you guessed it--take yet another shit. Ah, the pleasures of running, training hard, and a high metabolism. I use the opportunity to change the CD in my CD player (still no iPod, don't start on me) while I am in the can.
6:55AM Back on the treadmill, and a friend, Jamie, comes in. One of the first entrants into the Hottie Brigade. I love talking to him, it's like we both get motor mouth when we see one another. One of these days I hope I get to ride with him again.
7:55AM I'm done! It was a good idea to run on the treadmill today. My legs had been pretty beat up from last week, and they finally feel "normal" again. Well, as normal as you feel after running 2 hours.
8:15AM I'm back home, ass in chair, working, sucking down Endurox R4. Ready to face the leftover crises from yesterday, but I am easing into things, and after prioritizing, think it won't be such a hectic day after all.
10:15 One long call, and now I'm getting hungry. Colleague wants to chat post-team call, which is good, but I am fucking starving, so I'm on the speaker phone making myself breakfast or whatever it is. 4 eggs, 3 pieces of Canadian bacon chopped, scrambled and cooked in butter, English muffin also buttered. Man, I love eggs. I wolf this down and start to feel better.
12:00PM I'm fucking tired. I want a nap, but there's no time for that. Must keep working.
12:30PM Guy arrives to go over with me what yard work I'd like him to do. First time I'm paying someone to do some of it for me--I have just run out of time for some reason this year, and I want it finished before June rolls around! Stuff like trim all the shrubs, weeding, etc.
1:00PM Back into work crisis mode, but I seem to have a handle on things. Start wondering how I am going to make it through the day without a nap. Eat some bananas, which helps temporarily.
4:00PM Work is under control; maybe I can finish up my lifting from yesterday, so I do (16 minutes is all), but my muscles are screaming at me while I do it (bis, tris, chest), and yet I do a little posing in a mirror and am happy about how I look.
5:15PM I call it a day, workwise, and get ready to go to The Bike Shop. Load Bitch into car first, blanket on top, and LGL on top of her. My bikes are having sex back there. I'm concerned that the metals (magnesium and boron carbide) will commingle and birth some mutant bike back there.
5:40PM I'm at The Bike Shop. So what am I having done? Well...Bitch is getting BLUE (or as they call it, blau) Nokon cables! Also, I'm ditching the X-LAB and getting a carbon behind-the-seat-bottle holder. I needed to observe LGL being lubricated one more time so I know how to do it--she has special lubrication needs due to the way her Nokon's had to be installed. I also had them switch the cassette on the back (I can do it myself, but what the hell) since I'm riding in Wisconsin on Saturday. I also picked up my new Louis Garneau Rocket Helmet (I got the blue and white one, of course):


It's fucking gorgeous, and looks good with Bitchie. I also had shims put into the left shoe of both LGL's and Bitch's shoes, since my left foot is different than my right and my left leg has a functional shortness compared to my right. I also picked out new carbon cages (curiously enough, Profile Karbon Kages) for Bitchie once she has carbon on her butt and on the seat tube. She is going to look awesome once they are done with her! I also looked at (first time you are hearing about it) fixies online, and have decided on this one:


I'm going to put cowhorn bars on it with sweet bar tape, Cane Creek brake levers,

and no, I don't have a name for it (I think it's a HIM) yet.
8:30PM I get home (yes, my bike shop trips are legendary lately), throw pasta into the microwave, load the coffee pot, crack a beer, start making a list of crap I need to do on Friday, wolf down the food, decide I better eat more, think about TV, scrap that idea, grab a package of crackers and read yesterday's newspaper in bed for about 15 minutes, decide I better pass out since I have to be done swimming by 7:45AM (and I'm doing the 4,000 yard workout again).

Phew. Now it's Friday...
2:45AM I wake up. At first I'm not sure whether it's stress, I'm hungry, or I have to pee. Lay there for awhile, and guess what? I have to take a shit AND I'M HUNGRY. Take care of the first item, then make a sandwich, eat it while reading a little bit more of the newspaper, and then try and go back to sleep. No such luck, really, but laying down is still a good thing.
3:55AM I look at the clock and decide, close enough. I'm awake. Turn on the coffee pot, put on a record (I'm loving the new turntable, and I still LOVE Ska--like I need to listen to really fast, crazy music, you know). Grab a Power Bar and get rolling. Think about what I have to do today--swim 4,000 yards, work on major crisis at work, maybe run a little bit, go grocery shopping later (and booze sampling), stretch, fix bottles for Saturday's festival (Patti and I are riding the ENTIRE IMWI course and then running--I wonder if I can pull it off), begin packing for Saturday, set the coffee pot, OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG.

And yet, despite all this craziness, I am loving life!

I'm Hungry!

I have a feeling that the giant Barracuda is going to clean out the fridge...I better start eating!