I lifted these questions off of a Jim Vance blog post and thought it was about time I did some reflection on my 2008-2009 training and racing season. Here goes:
1. Season Goals - What were they? Did we achieve them?
My season goals were to enjoy one more year of Ironman level training and racing, hopefully culminating in a best-ever performance at IMLP and to avenge the poor season I had the year before (which couldn't be helped following the death of my Dad, but still...). In the back of my mind from the get go was that I was going to be done with Ironman in some shape or form.
Did I achieve this? Hell yeah. I felt so free from the bulk of the work in administering my Dad's estate, it felt like a get out of jail free card. I also had much of my house remodeled at the start of the season, so it was like I was set for a new beginning. I almost pinched myself when I also began a new relationship that I enjoyed in so many ways, and even though it ended, I didn't let it stop my momentum.
IMLP was nearly a perfect race for me. I made one rookie mistake on the run which was to wear something for the first time (hey, but the pirate thing looked cool, didn't it?) that caused me some GI distress, and then I was so stubborn in doing what I should have done earlier (puking). Still, the thing I am most proud of was that I was very much aware of how much physical pain I was in by going for the PR, and I moved through it just fine.
While I was ecstatic about my IMLP result, it was eclipsed by what happened next, which was a decision to just go for it and try double IM distance over 4 days as a training exercise, which got me to thinking that maybe I should register for Ultraman, and well, we all know how that turned out! I surprised myself by completing ROTPM in style and faster than I had dreamed possible.
2. What was the highest point of the season, the thing you were most excited about?
The highest point of the season was a couple of weeks before IMLP when I sat down and calculated what time I thought I could finish in. And I wrote the numbers on the big mirror in my bedroom so I could look at them every day and let them sink in together with a few inspirational quotes, the most notable one being (and it's still on there): "There is still pain but it does not bother you." And I wasn't very far off from the time prediction in the end except for my misstep on the run. In a way, it was this "knowing" that was even more exciting to me than the race itself. Knowing, believing and seeing that all the signs pointed to being in my best shape ever.
3. What were the misses this season? The things we didn't accomplish or missed out on.
My only real miss was at Triple T, in that I got sick and couldn't do the 1/2 Ironman. But at the time I knew that I had exceeded my own stress threshold, and in a way, it was a good thing, because I took some corrective actions right after that to get me back on track.
4. How did you feel about your fitness this year? What were the biggest strengths?
I can't remember ever feeling as fit, and it was evidenced in my race/event performances. My biggest strength continues to be my cycling, but I worked extra hard on my running this season, too, and saw some good improvements there, particularly in my ability to withstand more intensity and duration than in years past.
5. What in your training brought about the strengths?
Some of this may have been due to achieving an all-time low race weight but adding extra strength to the mix, so that I am certain I did not lose muscle mass. And it wasn't intentional. I had just been trying to shed maybe 4 lbs. of winter weight (having someone guess that you weigh 10 lbs. more than you do can help kick start change!) that I added due to some poor (but fun!) eating habits. At any rate, I found I was able to run faster and farther with seemingly no ill effects, and I did not lose any power on the bike. The other thing that may have helped is taking an unintentional break after jacking my back in November. Who knows about that, though?
At any rate, I biked harder and farther sooner in the training season than normal, and I ran hard whenever I felt like it and also added distance to my long runs over years past. Whether the ability to do this was based on my weight/body comp or accumulated experience or a slight rest in November doesn't really matter. The point is I could sense that I was able to push things more and so I did.
Also, right after Triple T, I began getting more sleep than I usually do in the traditional 8-week leadup to Ironman. And I believe that is making a huge difference in my ability to recover from very hard training.
6. What were your weaknesses in fitness?
Swimming. While I swam a decent amount for a triathlete, I just didn't push myself in the pool as I have in years past. I didn't really get any slower, but I didn't get any faster, either.
7. What could have been done to address these weaknesses in fitness?
Um...swim more and with more focus. Like I'm doing now! Get some swim coaching.
8. If you could change one thing about the season, what would it have been?
The only thing I can think of is that I should have realized my need for more sleep earlier on.
9. Based on this season, what are some initial goals for next year?
Well we are already in next year, aren't we? The big goal is to finish Ultraman Canada. In order for that to happen, I need to feel mentally and physically confident about the distances and the mental fortitude to do and absorb a greater amount of training than I've ever done while staying employed and not letting the rest of my life (relationships, house, R&R) go to hell. And making sure I continue to have fun training. Because I really do love it! Since I really won't be doing many races before UMC, the mental aspect is going to be even more pronounced, and I am already working on improving my mental strength and visualization. And I am finding and leaning on anyone I can to help me along the way to UMC with pep talks, training advice, inspirational stories, and a shoulder to cry on when it all stresses me out.
The other big goal is to figure out what I want to do after Ultraman. I am sure the journey will lead me to the answer to that question!
I could talk about some other life goals I've got going, too, but this is supposed to be about triathlon, isn't it?
10. Anything else you want to discuss about this year and next year?
Yes. I want to discuss how grateful and tickled I am to find myself doing what I am doing at this stage of my life. Knowing that it's not for everyone, and that it doesn't make me any better of a person than anyone else, but I can't help but feel excited and maybe obsessed. Is that such a bad thing? I don't know. I do know that my time here on Earth is limited, and I have no idea how long I will be this fit and healthy, so the time is now to do something with it, eh?
Saturday, December 05, 2009
Thursday, December 03, 2009
The Mind Games
Training to get faster and go farther is a mind game. Your brain thinks you might get hurt and holds back your pace or tries to get you to stop. The objective is to override the thought process and move beyond the pain, in fact, fooling your brain into thinking what you are doing is normal and you won't get hurt. Our brains are so concerned with our physical well-being that they will put on the brakes well in advance of actual physical shutdown.
Over the years, I've learned that I can push out the point, for example, when I will actually bonk. I've learned to understand my brain's signals that are telling me I might be running out of fuel and sometimes ignore them. And then if I actually make it to full bonk, I rather enjoy it, because it's like I "beat myself." But if I don't, joke's on me--I may be able to make it farther the next time a bonk is imminent.
Same with really hard workouts, especially threshold intervals on the trainer. Your brain is yelling at your legs that what you are doing is hard so you should just give up and quit. But there are ways to effectively ignore the message and just keep going. One way is sheer motivation. After all, if you don't mentally see the point in what you are doing, why would you keep doing it? Another way is by forcing yourself to relax. Yes, relax! When you make your legs relax just a bit, the pedal strokes can become smoother and easier. Another way is to tell yourself that you can finish the interval and then relax. Sometimes the brain gives in once it knows that what you are doing is going to stop soon enough. Finally, there's the element of practice or repetition. If you keep doing something that your brain finds difficult, if you do it often enough, you are able to override the controls.
Why is it that we can sprint at the end of an Ironman, yet we couldn't run that fast the entire time? Because we always have a reserve left in us. Part of the ability to access that reserve is to practice doing it in training. A lot! Like if I'm really tired and would rather not do a workout, I go and do it anyway, because what's the worst that can happen? Partway through I decide to bag it anyway. Or not, and it ends up going really well. On many outdoor runs, I make it a point to run the last mile home as fast as I can for the distance I've gone on the day. It's even become a game to try and hold back from doing this, but it just comes naturally. Just yesterday, it happened again, and I even had a little bit of the dry heaves when I finished! See this is a sign that I pushed it a little, and while my brain is telling my body to make like I'm about to keel over, I just laugh at it (I really do laugh when it happens) and know that next time it won't feel any worse.
Should I play this game during every workout? No. But I have developed a sense when it's OK to go faster or farther than I had planned, and I take advantage of it whenever I can. I suppose that's part of the reason my nickname is Crackhead. But really, it's all one big controlled experiment, because whenever I do try and push the envelope, I find out whether it was the right thing to do or not. And I guess I've just developed a good relationship with Mr. Brain, because part of the game is learning how frequently I can do it and recover from it.
I'm sure it seems to many people that I have the most regimented training plan. In a sense, I do. But now that I am training for something that is only a known ANSWER with an infinite number of QUESTIONS, I am letting the "plan" be a guideline, for what I think I can do at any given point in time. I know very well how to make an ATP, and this time was no different. I chose some events around which to build key training sessions, and then wove it all together with build up, taper and recovery. And then I started in on it, and found out that having no idea what I really could do against the so-called plan, that I felt freer to experiment here and there and it's been completely fun! Well, fun if you like training a lot. Which I do.
But Mr. Brain is always working and just waiting for me to try something that he can make me fail at. There is actually a section of my plan that starts in May that I have a post-it flag on with a note to "revisit this." So far, every time I look at what I have on there I just sort of shake my head and go how the fuck am I going to do that? But I have learned already that I am able to do things now that I didn't think I'd be doing for 3 or 4 months, so maybe by the time May rolls around, I will just "do the plan." Or not. Who knows?
It's been hilarious that I will be in the middle of some workout where I am really pushing myself and I let Mr. Brain just wander and instead of trying to get me to stop, he starts thinking what ELSE I can do! This is an interesting phenomenon, because while that process used to only happen a couple of times a year, now it is happening every few weeks, and it is really fantastic. I only write this down because I have no idea if this is the same thing that other people experience or not. It is just such a cool state of mind to be in, because half of what comes to mind is visualization for finishing Ultraman or what happens afterward (it's a secret for now), and the other half is what can I be doing now to make that a certainty?
I know other athletes who say they "train by feel," and I guess maybe this is what they mean? I guess it's taken me 10 years to get there, but then again, I never was very athletic until now. I am still 100% convinced that the act of training big and hard is very much a mental exercise. You have to believe you can do it, even when other things in your life are dragging you down mentally or physically, when you are having a bad workout (rare for me!) or when you are unable to override your brain and actually hold back your pace or workout time. Underneath all that, is you have to want it, believe in it and feel it. For me, it's this sense of a "mission." What I'm doing to me is like art--I'm doing it for its own sake, because I've figured out how to do it and am somewhat good at it.
To me, this is all pretty cool for a regular working stiff. I am not going to break any records or change the world by doing this. All I can change is myself. I just need to keep Mr. Brain on board with it!
Over the years, I've learned that I can push out the point, for example, when I will actually bonk. I've learned to understand my brain's signals that are telling me I might be running out of fuel and sometimes ignore them. And then if I actually make it to full bonk, I rather enjoy it, because it's like I "beat myself." But if I don't, joke's on me--I may be able to make it farther the next time a bonk is imminent.
Same with really hard workouts, especially threshold intervals on the trainer. Your brain is yelling at your legs that what you are doing is hard so you should just give up and quit. But there are ways to effectively ignore the message and just keep going. One way is sheer motivation. After all, if you don't mentally see the point in what you are doing, why would you keep doing it? Another way is by forcing yourself to relax. Yes, relax! When you make your legs relax just a bit, the pedal strokes can become smoother and easier. Another way is to tell yourself that you can finish the interval and then relax. Sometimes the brain gives in once it knows that what you are doing is going to stop soon enough. Finally, there's the element of practice or repetition. If you keep doing something that your brain finds difficult, if you do it often enough, you are able to override the controls.
Why is it that we can sprint at the end of an Ironman, yet we couldn't run that fast the entire time? Because we always have a reserve left in us. Part of the ability to access that reserve is to practice doing it in training. A lot! Like if I'm really tired and would rather not do a workout, I go and do it anyway, because what's the worst that can happen? Partway through I decide to bag it anyway. Or not, and it ends up going really well. On many outdoor runs, I make it a point to run the last mile home as fast as I can for the distance I've gone on the day. It's even become a game to try and hold back from doing this, but it just comes naturally. Just yesterday, it happened again, and I even had a little bit of the dry heaves when I finished! See this is a sign that I pushed it a little, and while my brain is telling my body to make like I'm about to keel over, I just laugh at it (I really do laugh when it happens) and know that next time it won't feel any worse.
Should I play this game during every workout? No. But I have developed a sense when it's OK to go faster or farther than I had planned, and I take advantage of it whenever I can. I suppose that's part of the reason my nickname is Crackhead. But really, it's all one big controlled experiment, because whenever I do try and push the envelope, I find out whether it was the right thing to do or not. And I guess I've just developed a good relationship with Mr. Brain, because part of the game is learning how frequently I can do it and recover from it.
I'm sure it seems to many people that I have the most regimented training plan. In a sense, I do. But now that I am training for something that is only a known ANSWER with an infinite number of QUESTIONS, I am letting the "plan" be a guideline, for what I think I can do at any given point in time. I know very well how to make an ATP, and this time was no different. I chose some events around which to build key training sessions, and then wove it all together with build up, taper and recovery. And then I started in on it, and found out that having no idea what I really could do against the so-called plan, that I felt freer to experiment here and there and it's been completely fun! Well, fun if you like training a lot. Which I do.
But Mr. Brain is always working and just waiting for me to try something that he can make me fail at. There is actually a section of my plan that starts in May that I have a post-it flag on with a note to "revisit this." So far, every time I look at what I have on there I just sort of shake my head and go how the fuck am I going to do that? But I have learned already that I am able to do things now that I didn't think I'd be doing for 3 or 4 months, so maybe by the time May rolls around, I will just "do the plan." Or not. Who knows?
It's been hilarious that I will be in the middle of some workout where I am really pushing myself and I let Mr. Brain just wander and instead of trying to get me to stop, he starts thinking what ELSE I can do! This is an interesting phenomenon, because while that process used to only happen a couple of times a year, now it is happening every few weeks, and it is really fantastic. I only write this down because I have no idea if this is the same thing that other people experience or not. It is just such a cool state of mind to be in, because half of what comes to mind is visualization for finishing Ultraman or what happens afterward (it's a secret for now), and the other half is what can I be doing now to make that a certainty?
I know other athletes who say they "train by feel," and I guess maybe this is what they mean? I guess it's taken me 10 years to get there, but then again, I never was very athletic until now. I am still 100% convinced that the act of training big and hard is very much a mental exercise. You have to believe you can do it, even when other things in your life are dragging you down mentally or physically, when you are having a bad workout (rare for me!) or when you are unable to override your brain and actually hold back your pace or workout time. Underneath all that, is you have to want it, believe in it and feel it. For me, it's this sense of a "mission." What I'm doing to me is like art--I'm doing it for its own sake, because I've figured out how to do it and am somewhat good at it.
To me, this is all pretty cool for a regular working stiff. I am not going to break any records or change the world by doing this. All I can change is myself. I just need to keep Mr. Brain on board with it!
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