My friend Marty made me this cartoon. I will treasure it always!
Thursday, August 12, 2010
The Official Race Report Begins...NOW!!!
Hold on to your shorts and prepare to be dazzled by my wit! I still can't say how long it will take to get through all of it, but you may get an idea by reading this first installment, which is just about the swim! Enjoy!
Day 1: 10K swim
Goal: 4 hours
Actual: 4:15. Why? I think there were currents in there!
I did 14 swims in training of 8,000 or more yards. The first one of those I did was on 12/7/2009. I did one full 10K swim on New Year’s Day 2010, too. All my training was in a pool, and on race day, other than the short (:25) practice swim with the kayak on Thursday before the race, I had not done an open water swim since Ironman Lake Placid 2009. I would usually pull for several thousand yards of these swims, including paddles, thinking it would make me stronger and more fatigue resistant. I think it worked! I’m no great swimmer and didn’t get any faster (I averaged about 11,500 yards per week for the entire season), but I didn’t get any slower, either. Just as I structure my run and bike workouts to get progressively faster (harder), I would model my long swims in the same way. When I initially made my training plan in September, 2009, I had all these grandiose ideas about these mega-interval sets for the long swims, but I ended up just swimming 1000, 1500, 2000 or sometimes more straight free and then do a little kicking while I drank some Infinit, whatever I could do to make the time go by quickly, then do pulling, then pulling with paddles, and even some swimming with the fins on. I also found that I needed to replace all the calories I’d burned immediately after these swims if I had any hopes of remaining upright and living to train the next day. I could only get this much lap swim time starting at 5AM, and I did these beasts on Fridays before work. I learned pretty quickly that I needed to have my glycogen stores loaded the night before, eat about 250 calories right when I woke up, drink the requisite amount of calories from Infinit per hour while swimming, and then eat an entire meal as soon as I got home. The first few 8,000+ swims beat the shit out of me. My rationale was that a 3-hour ride doesn’t trash me very much, and that a 2-3 hour swim should be much easier, and should tire me out less than a 2-hour run, right? Wrong. Initially, at least. Again, learning and practicing the proper night before, morning of, during swim and post-swim nutrition was critical. Plus I had read race reports (thanks, Vince!) of others who really screwed themselves in Ultraman by not ingesting sufficient fluid and/or calories during the swim.
Come race day, I knew I had the endurance and strength to swim 10K not exactly “comfortably,” but I wouldn’t be gassed. And I’d practiced the nutrition thing for many months. My only source of fear was chop in the water. When I did the practice swim with my ace kayaker, Steve, on Thursday evening, we did it in Lake Okanagan, and it was windy and choppy and I freaked out a bit, but I KNEW I was freaking out, so I just let it happen and then I calmed back down. However, if Skaha Lake had been as choppy as that on race day, I am sure I would have had some problems. Or not. Who knows?
Let me back up. On Friday, I drank only Gatorade (no plain water) to super-load my body with sodium in case it got hot. I also ate two Lava Salts right before going to bed. I always do the nighttime salt tabs before an Ironman or really long training day (7+ hours) as a “just in case.” On race morning, I choked down 600 calories of Ultrafuel and ate a Power Bar Triple Threat for a total of about 830 calories plus 1 or 2 small cups of coffee, and then I sipped maybe another 50 calories of Gatorade while setting up at the swim start. I usually take in 400 calories of Ultrafuel plus eat about 200 calories something else on training days where I am going 5+ hours, and for 3-5 hours I might just do 200-300 calories of Ultrafuel. I have been using that stuff ever since I began training for my first ½ Ironman at the advice of my first coach. The stuff is not very expensive and works. It is great on a race day because even for say, just an Ironman, you don’t get any calories while you swim, but you burn a bunch, and it tides you over until you can start taking in calories again on the bike. When I drink it though, it puts me into an insulin coma, and I get chills, my nose runs, I might even gag a few times, and I want to lie down. In training I can drink it just an hour before go time, but on race day I like 2-3 hours ahead. The insulin coma only lasts about 15 minutes anyway. For Ultraman, I decided that 600 calories of Ultrafuel would be better since I would be running a high caloric deficit by the end of each day, so I may as well start with a super-loaded tank. It was the right thing to do.
I started with a brand new pair of Tyr junior whatever goggles. I had tried an Aquasphere mask that worked for me ONCE in training then thereafter leaked, and I’d tried countless goggles with silicone gaskets that just didn’t work for me. But I was OK coming out after long swims with raccoon face (or as I liked to call it, “accident victim”), and same on race day. I wore my 1-piece sushi suit that was faded. I was on my second one of these suits, and I always wore it for the long swims because the straps didn’t dig into my shoulders. I have many nice Splish suits, including custom suits, but I would only wear those during my Monday/Wednesday shorter swims.
Here is a short video that gives you perspective on just how far a 10K swim in Skaha Lake is:
Anyway, after I talked to Steve and everything was loaded into the kayak, they made us all pose for a group picture. I about broke down and cried, which was to be a regular occurrence during the event. Not so much out of fear, but out of actually being there, actually doing the race that I’d worked so hard to train for for so long. Tears of joy, mostly! And also acknowledging the magnitude of what we were all doing.
Steve Brown told us all to get in the water, and the kayakers were already out a little ways, and that our paddlers would have to find us or vice versa, so I spied where Steve was and walked in. I did not do a warm-up swim, are you kidding me??? Plenty of time to warm up while doing the swim! Then we all counted down from either 10 or 5—I can’t remember—and we were officially on our way. Skaha Lake was nice and calm, although earlier Steve Brown had warned the kayakers about some chop and hearing that frightened me a little, but then I forgot about it.
After the countdown, I just bent over, put my face in and started swimming! The cool water felt so good; since my pool was usually around 85 degrees (my guess is the lake was 70-72). I could tell this water was clean, too. I just started swimming and felt completely relaxed, much like my training swims. I had so many people ask me during training how I could swim that long, and my response always was that it is a form of meditation to me. NOBODY can get to you while you are swimming, and besides, I really like to count ;) I found Steve pretty easily, and we settled into our route, with him leading the way. I think that he picked a perfect line down that lake, and if he happens to be able to get to Kona in 2011, I’d be honored to have him paddle for me in the Ultraman there.
The plan was for Steve to stop me every 40 minutes to drink some Infinit, which he had on ice in the boat. He had this floaty thing he would put on the end of the paddle to make it, well, FLOAT, and stick it out and that made it easy for me to grab on and hold while I drank. The first time he signaled me, I sort of got indignant and yelled, “THAT CAN’T BE FORTY MINUTES!” And then he asked how I was feeling, and I said, “This is all very surreal.” For, in fact, the 40 minutes had gone by in the blink of an eye. It felt to me like I had finally succeeded in not thinking at all, even though I was somehow commanding my body to swim. If I could bottle that feeling, I’d be a rich woman! I felt like serenity personified. The Infinit was ice cold, so cold; in fact, I’d get a chill from drinking it. But I knew that I needed those calories.
The second 40 minutes also went by quickly and once again Steve asked me how I was feeling and once again I said, “This is still all so surreal.” I was still in a meditative state and feeling really great. I’m figuring I am about 4K into the swim, and I think I was right, but how could we tell? The first buoy is at the 8K mark, and you couldn’t see it from shore, and you couldn’t see it 4K in, either. I just focused on swimming relaxed and turning to breathe and look at the kayak. Steve said to me, “You are doing FUCKING awesome.” And I looked behind me and saw other kayaks a ways back and was shocked that I would be ahead of anyone.
Sometime after this, I’m not sure how far in, we hit this area of totally calm, glassy water. It was calmer than my pool! This made me laugh, which is tough to do while swimming, but you can sort of do it as you exhale underwater, and finally I had to stop and tell Steve that, “This is like a swimming pool!” He probably thought I was nuts, but we soldiered on. It was at this point that I actually began kicking, which I usually don’t do in a wetsuit, and sometimes my calves would cramp up a little bit, but I know how to work those out, and I was shocked not only that I could kick—I could stroke, kick, breathe AND PEE all at once! In my wetsuit! I think I ended up peeing 7 or 8 times during the swim—the combination of the cool water, the ice-cold Infinit (with caffeine!!!) and the Ultrafuel helped that. Anyway, once I started on the kicking, I kept doing it the rest of the time. It was such a new thing to me kicking in a wetsuit, and I’m glad I am now comfortable doing it!
I don’t know how far in we were when this motorboat came by with our head photographer, Rick Kent, on board. I did not know they would take photos of us during the swim! It turns out there were a lot of things that surprised me during the 3 days, and that was a good thing. Anyway, he tells Steve to go off a bit so he can snap just me swimming. I don’t remember if Steve did, but then I decided to just stand up and try and jump up out of the water with a huge smile on my face. Some yards after this, Steve tells me I’m quite the poser for the camera. We had a good laugh about that.
The glass didn’t last too long, but I was pretty good through about 7K. That is the point even in my practice swims where I would start to realize I was swimming a lot. Nothing really hurt, though—my deltoids got a tad sore only from wearing the wetsuit. The longest swim I had done with the wetsuit on was 6700 yards, so it made sense to me that my delts would tell me they weren’t happy. But the rest of me was just fine—I had applied copious amounts of Body Glide under my swimsuit straps and seams and on my neck. For awhile, I thought I might be chafing on the neck, but it turned out to be Lee’s expert closure of my wetsuit, and I didn’t experience any chafing from the swim! Also, in case no other athlete’s race report points this out, we do not wear chips, nor does anyone write numbers on you for Ultraman! With only 39 people starting, why would we need body numbers or chips? So why was my race number 103 with only 39 starters???
In training, I always spend equal amounts of time breathing on my left and right sides. I enjoy playing around with breathing patterns—it gives me something to do, you know? Helps make the yards go by quickly. But in races I typically go with right side only. I was concerned that I would jack up my neck muscles by doing this, but I was just fine breathing only to the right. There were a few times I would go bilateral, and it was just to have a change of pace.
When we finally got to that 8K turn buoy, the water had picked up a little chop, but nothing that made me nervous, but man that last 2K seemed to take FOREVER! Now you can see the shore, and I’m like hell bent on getting the fuck out of this lake! Not that I hadn’t enjoyed the swim, but I wanted poor Steve to be able to get on with his day and I still had some biking to do! It was a tough last 2K, but finally I got into shallow water, and again surprised myself by just standing up and not falling over! After my pool swims, I would feel a little woozy getting out after several hours, but I was fine today. But I realized my stomach was a bit jumbled. The other thing is that my resting heart rate has gone in the dumpster from this training, so sometimes when I stand up after lying down I feel a bit dizzy because my heart can’t catch up. I am just happy that someone told me that it’s normal for my low resting HR.
So I get out, and now the fun begins. I see the clock and I’m like WHAT THE FUCK WHERE DID THOSE EXTRA :15 COME FROM? But I was chill with it because I knew I wouldn’t have trouble with the first ride. My crew came and got me and supported me, and for some reason I felt compelled to RUN to the changing tent where all my crap had been stashed. Once again, I was surprised, I did not even think that the swim started in one place and ended someplace completely different, and that my crew had to travel there and get all this crap ready for me to come out of the water. They stripped my wetsuit, and I began changing, not in a total hurry, but not lollygagging either. They put sunscreen on me (Lee and Mona were in the tent with me and all my naked glory), got me dressed, and then Richard was standing by with my bike, which somehow had gotten to the new location as well (I was amazed by all this), and now I have to mount my bike and get riding.
Please note that at Ultraman they don’t time your transitions, so as soon as you finish swimming, the time becomes part of your bike time. I am hoping I didn’t spend more than :10 in transition, and I know I can do this a bit faster at Ultraman Hawaii.
What I Did Well
I swam steadily and did not slow down too much except for the currents. I executed my nutrition perfectly and did not chafe. I enjoyed myself, sucking in all the wonder of what I was doing. I learned how to pee without stopping my stroke, and I learned how to kick while wearing my wetsuit.
What I Can Improve On
I plan on either getting some swim coaching or swimming with my local Masters team once a week this fall or both, depending on what the Masters coach thinks will be best for me. I would like to be fast enough to complete a 10K swim in 3:30, and I think that is a reasonable goal. That would give me a nice cushion for Hawaii in case of swells and currents. For Hawaii, since it is guaranteed to be hot, I will wear part of my biking kit so there is less changing for me to do. Or maybe not, because it's good to get the salt water all off you once you come out of the ocean.
What Concerns me About Hawaii
I've swum in decent swells, but not sure about currents. My biggest concern though, is jellyfish. I've had allergic reactions to bee and wasp stings, and heard the sea lice are a bit troublesome. I already know what it's like to swim and see 50-75 feet down into the fish bowl. I may try some other goggles again, since while I did not get a headache this time, I wouldn't mind a bit more comfort.
Day 1: 10K swim
Goal: 4 hours
Actual: 4:15. Why? I think there were currents in there!
I did 14 swims in training of 8,000 or more yards. The first one of those I did was on 12/7/2009. I did one full 10K swim on New Year’s Day 2010, too. All my training was in a pool, and on race day, other than the short (:25) practice swim with the kayak on Thursday before the race, I had not done an open water swim since Ironman Lake Placid 2009. I would usually pull for several thousand yards of these swims, including paddles, thinking it would make me stronger and more fatigue resistant. I think it worked! I’m no great swimmer and didn’t get any faster (I averaged about 11,500 yards per week for the entire season), but I didn’t get any slower, either. Just as I structure my run and bike workouts to get progressively faster (harder), I would model my long swims in the same way. When I initially made my training plan in September, 2009, I had all these grandiose ideas about these mega-interval sets for the long swims, but I ended up just swimming 1000, 1500, 2000 or sometimes more straight free and then do a little kicking while I drank some Infinit, whatever I could do to make the time go by quickly, then do pulling, then pulling with paddles, and even some swimming with the fins on. I also found that I needed to replace all the calories I’d burned immediately after these swims if I had any hopes of remaining upright and living to train the next day. I could only get this much lap swim time starting at 5AM, and I did these beasts on Fridays before work. I learned pretty quickly that I needed to have my glycogen stores loaded the night before, eat about 250 calories right when I woke up, drink the requisite amount of calories from Infinit per hour while swimming, and then eat an entire meal as soon as I got home. The first few 8,000+ swims beat the shit out of me. My rationale was that a 3-hour ride doesn’t trash me very much, and that a 2-3 hour swim should be much easier, and should tire me out less than a 2-hour run, right? Wrong. Initially, at least. Again, learning and practicing the proper night before, morning of, during swim and post-swim nutrition was critical. Plus I had read race reports (thanks, Vince!) of others who really screwed themselves in Ultraman by not ingesting sufficient fluid and/or calories during the swim.
Come race day, I knew I had the endurance and strength to swim 10K not exactly “comfortably,” but I wouldn’t be gassed. And I’d practiced the nutrition thing for many months. My only source of fear was chop in the water. When I did the practice swim with my ace kayaker, Steve, on Thursday evening, we did it in Lake Okanagan, and it was windy and choppy and I freaked out a bit, but I KNEW I was freaking out, so I just let it happen and then I calmed back down. However, if Skaha Lake had been as choppy as that on race day, I am sure I would have had some problems. Or not. Who knows?
Let me back up. On Friday, I drank only Gatorade (no plain water) to super-load my body with sodium in case it got hot. I also ate two Lava Salts right before going to bed. I always do the nighttime salt tabs before an Ironman or really long training day (7+ hours) as a “just in case.” On race morning, I choked down 600 calories of Ultrafuel and ate a Power Bar Triple Threat for a total of about 830 calories plus 1 or 2 small cups of coffee, and then I sipped maybe another 50 calories of Gatorade while setting up at the swim start. I usually take in 400 calories of Ultrafuel plus eat about 200 calories something else on training days where I am going 5+ hours, and for 3-5 hours I might just do 200-300 calories of Ultrafuel. I have been using that stuff ever since I began training for my first ½ Ironman at the advice of my first coach. The stuff is not very expensive and works. It is great on a race day because even for say, just an Ironman, you don’t get any calories while you swim, but you burn a bunch, and it tides you over until you can start taking in calories again on the bike. When I drink it though, it puts me into an insulin coma, and I get chills, my nose runs, I might even gag a few times, and I want to lie down. In training I can drink it just an hour before go time, but on race day I like 2-3 hours ahead. The insulin coma only lasts about 15 minutes anyway. For Ultraman, I decided that 600 calories of Ultrafuel would be better since I would be running a high caloric deficit by the end of each day, so I may as well start with a super-loaded tank. It was the right thing to do.
I started with a brand new pair of Tyr junior whatever goggles. I had tried an Aquasphere mask that worked for me ONCE in training then thereafter leaked, and I’d tried countless goggles with silicone gaskets that just didn’t work for me. But I was OK coming out after long swims with raccoon face (or as I liked to call it, “accident victim”), and same on race day. I wore my 1-piece sushi suit that was faded. I was on my second one of these suits, and I always wore it for the long swims because the straps didn’t dig into my shoulders. I have many nice Splish suits, including custom suits, but I would only wear those during my Monday/Wednesday shorter swims.
Here is a short video that gives you perspective on just how far a 10K swim in Skaha Lake is:
Anyway, after I talked to Steve and everything was loaded into the kayak, they made us all pose for a group picture. I about broke down and cried, which was to be a regular occurrence during the event. Not so much out of fear, but out of actually being there, actually doing the race that I’d worked so hard to train for for so long. Tears of joy, mostly! And also acknowledging the magnitude of what we were all doing.
Steve Brown told us all to get in the water, and the kayakers were already out a little ways, and that our paddlers would have to find us or vice versa, so I spied where Steve was and walked in. I did not do a warm-up swim, are you kidding me??? Plenty of time to warm up while doing the swim! Then we all counted down from either 10 or 5—I can’t remember—and we were officially on our way. Skaha Lake was nice and calm, although earlier Steve Brown had warned the kayakers about some chop and hearing that frightened me a little, but then I forgot about it.
After the countdown, I just bent over, put my face in and started swimming! The cool water felt so good; since my pool was usually around 85 degrees (my guess is the lake was 70-72). I could tell this water was clean, too. I just started swimming and felt completely relaxed, much like my training swims. I had so many people ask me during training how I could swim that long, and my response always was that it is a form of meditation to me. NOBODY can get to you while you are swimming, and besides, I really like to count ;) I found Steve pretty easily, and we settled into our route, with him leading the way. I think that he picked a perfect line down that lake, and if he happens to be able to get to Kona in 2011, I’d be honored to have him paddle for me in the Ultraman there.
The plan was for Steve to stop me every 40 minutes to drink some Infinit, which he had on ice in the boat. He had this floaty thing he would put on the end of the paddle to make it, well, FLOAT, and stick it out and that made it easy for me to grab on and hold while I drank. The first time he signaled me, I sort of got indignant and yelled, “THAT CAN’T BE FORTY MINUTES!” And then he asked how I was feeling, and I said, “This is all very surreal.” For, in fact, the 40 minutes had gone by in the blink of an eye. It felt to me like I had finally succeeded in not thinking at all, even though I was somehow commanding my body to swim. If I could bottle that feeling, I’d be a rich woman! I felt like serenity personified. The Infinit was ice cold, so cold; in fact, I’d get a chill from drinking it. But I knew that I needed those calories.
The second 40 minutes also went by quickly and once again Steve asked me how I was feeling and once again I said, “This is still all so surreal.” I was still in a meditative state and feeling really great. I’m figuring I am about 4K into the swim, and I think I was right, but how could we tell? The first buoy is at the 8K mark, and you couldn’t see it from shore, and you couldn’t see it 4K in, either. I just focused on swimming relaxed and turning to breathe and look at the kayak. Steve said to me, “You are doing FUCKING awesome.” And I looked behind me and saw other kayaks a ways back and was shocked that I would be ahead of anyone.
Sometime after this, I’m not sure how far in, we hit this area of totally calm, glassy water. It was calmer than my pool! This made me laugh, which is tough to do while swimming, but you can sort of do it as you exhale underwater, and finally I had to stop and tell Steve that, “This is like a swimming pool!” He probably thought I was nuts, but we soldiered on. It was at this point that I actually began kicking, which I usually don’t do in a wetsuit, and sometimes my calves would cramp up a little bit, but I know how to work those out, and I was shocked not only that I could kick—I could stroke, kick, breathe AND PEE all at once! In my wetsuit! I think I ended up peeing 7 or 8 times during the swim—the combination of the cool water, the ice-cold Infinit (with caffeine!!!) and the Ultrafuel helped that. Anyway, once I started on the kicking, I kept doing it the rest of the time. It was such a new thing to me kicking in a wetsuit, and I’m glad I am now comfortable doing it!
I don’t know how far in we were when this motorboat came by with our head photographer, Rick Kent, on board. I did not know they would take photos of us during the swim! It turns out there were a lot of things that surprised me during the 3 days, and that was a good thing. Anyway, he tells Steve to go off a bit so he can snap just me swimming. I don’t remember if Steve did, but then I decided to just stand up and try and jump up out of the water with a huge smile on my face. Some yards after this, Steve tells me I’m quite the poser for the camera. We had a good laugh about that.
The glass didn’t last too long, but I was pretty good through about 7K. That is the point even in my practice swims where I would start to realize I was swimming a lot. Nothing really hurt, though—my deltoids got a tad sore only from wearing the wetsuit. The longest swim I had done with the wetsuit on was 6700 yards, so it made sense to me that my delts would tell me they weren’t happy. But the rest of me was just fine—I had applied copious amounts of Body Glide under my swimsuit straps and seams and on my neck. For awhile, I thought I might be chafing on the neck, but it turned out to be Lee’s expert closure of my wetsuit, and I didn’t experience any chafing from the swim! Also, in case no other athlete’s race report points this out, we do not wear chips, nor does anyone write numbers on you for Ultraman! With only 39 people starting, why would we need body numbers or chips? So why was my race number 103 with only 39 starters???
In training, I always spend equal amounts of time breathing on my left and right sides. I enjoy playing around with breathing patterns—it gives me something to do, you know? Helps make the yards go by quickly. But in races I typically go with right side only. I was concerned that I would jack up my neck muscles by doing this, but I was just fine breathing only to the right. There were a few times I would go bilateral, and it was just to have a change of pace.
When we finally got to that 8K turn buoy, the water had picked up a little chop, but nothing that made me nervous, but man that last 2K seemed to take FOREVER! Now you can see the shore, and I’m like hell bent on getting the fuck out of this lake! Not that I hadn’t enjoyed the swim, but I wanted poor Steve to be able to get on with his day and I still had some biking to do! It was a tough last 2K, but finally I got into shallow water, and again surprised myself by just standing up and not falling over! After my pool swims, I would feel a little woozy getting out after several hours, but I was fine today. But I realized my stomach was a bit jumbled. The other thing is that my resting heart rate has gone in the dumpster from this training, so sometimes when I stand up after lying down I feel a bit dizzy because my heart can’t catch up. I am just happy that someone told me that it’s normal for my low resting HR.
So I get out, and now the fun begins. I see the clock and I’m like WHAT THE FUCK WHERE DID THOSE EXTRA :15 COME FROM? But I was chill with it because I knew I wouldn’t have trouble with the first ride. My crew came and got me and supported me, and for some reason I felt compelled to RUN to the changing tent where all my crap had been stashed. Once again, I was surprised, I did not even think that the swim started in one place and ended someplace completely different, and that my crew had to travel there and get all this crap ready for me to come out of the water. They stripped my wetsuit, and I began changing, not in a total hurry, but not lollygagging either. They put sunscreen on me (Lee and Mona were in the tent with me and all my naked glory), got me dressed, and then Richard was standing by with my bike, which somehow had gotten to the new location as well (I was amazed by all this), and now I have to mount my bike and get riding.
Please note that at Ultraman they don’t time your transitions, so as soon as you finish swimming, the time becomes part of your bike time. I am hoping I didn’t spend more than :10 in transition, and I know I can do this a bit faster at Ultraman Hawaii.
What I Did Well
I swam steadily and did not slow down too much except for the currents. I executed my nutrition perfectly and did not chafe. I enjoyed myself, sucking in all the wonder of what I was doing. I learned how to pee without stopping my stroke, and I learned how to kick while wearing my wetsuit.
What I Can Improve On
I plan on either getting some swim coaching or swimming with my local Masters team once a week this fall or both, depending on what the Masters coach thinks will be best for me. I would like to be fast enough to complete a 10K swim in 3:30, and I think that is a reasonable goal. That would give me a nice cushion for Hawaii in case of swells and currents. For Hawaii, since it is guaranteed to be hot, I will wear part of my biking kit so there is less changing for me to do. Or maybe not, because it's good to get the salt water all off you once you come out of the ocean.
What Concerns me About Hawaii
I've swum in decent swells, but not sure about currents. My biggest concern though, is jellyfish. I've had allergic reactions to bee and wasp stings, and heard the sea lice are a bit troublesome. I already know what it's like to swim and see 50-75 feet down into the fish bowl. I may try some other goggles again, since while I did not get a headache this time, I wouldn't mind a bit more comfort.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
We All Have a Crew
I keep meaning to write up an actual race report for UMC, but I might just save it for a book I want to write. In the meantime, while I train (yes, I’m training again, just not so much), instead of needing to think of so many details about the race or things I need to get done immediately (I have a giant “to do” list going that I will begin to chip away at soon), I am relaxed enough to think about what’s going on inside my head.
Over the last 10 years, Ironman training and racing (and now Ultraman) has become my vehicle for self-discovery and self-improvement, not just in the athletic arena, but my entire life. I got a lot out of the Ironman years and pushed through many personal challenges where I felt alone in many ways, but learned to accept more and more help from others. I tend to try and do as much on my own as possible, and it has made me a strong, confident woman, but I also know that life is about helping others, so as I sought to also help others I found it easier to reach out and ask for help myself.
Aside from the distances involved, Ultraman is much different than Ironman because you are required to have a crew. One cannot complete Ultraman alone. This was very new to me, but a year ago, I thought, hey, I shouldn’t have any problems getting a crew from amongst my friends, should I? I turned out to be wrong. Asking someone to crew for you for Ultraman is a big deal. The crew is as busy, at times busier, than the athlete for several days pre-race and post-race. If I were wealthy, I would offer to pay all the crew’s travel expenses, but I’m not, so I couldn’t offer that. What could I offer them? The opportunity to be part of a team effort that I would be forever grateful for.
Initially I did have two people offer to crew for me, but they changed their minds. This was a disappointment, but I didn’t get too concerned, as the race will find you a crew if you can’t find your own, and now I know there are some very wonderful people out there who crew year after year, offering their help (kokua, in Hawaiian) to athletes they have never met. In March, out of seemingly nowhere, Lee tells me she has bought plane tickets to Penticton to crew for me. It made me feel so odd that someone who had just been reading my blog for about a year and lives in Japan would do that for me. I was just closing my Dad’s estate after just over 2 years of working my butt off to get things done and maintain my own composure while being helped by some wonderful people, but also struggling with some people whose mission seemed to be to try and bring me to my emotional and spiritual knees.
Just from talking to Lee via Facebook and email I could tell she was reliable and wouldn’t bug out on me no matter what. I was just beginning the phase of some inner doubts as to my ability to make it to the UMC start line, and Lee (and a few others) listened and gave me more reasons to not throw in the towel. I still needed two additional crew members, preferring people I knew at least over the Internet! Once again, my cries for help were answered by Richard and Mona.
So you know the rest of the story, right? Lee, Richard, Mona and Steve (Steve was my most excellent kayaker and swim navigator) crewed for me at Ultraman Canada and I cannot thank them enough for what they did. Having lived by myself the last 16 years, 10 of which have been spent in elite-level triathlon training and relying mostly on myself for so many things, it was such a delight to be taken care of by these people! I still miss Mom and Dad, and while they had a hands-off strategy with me which is part of what has made me the person that I am (“too independent” remarked my Mom many years ago, much to her chagrin), I was so happy to be cared for like a baby! When it comes down to it, the Ultraman athlete is moving, eating, peeing and pooping. We call out when we need something, we grimace when we don’t know what we want, we get paranoid if we don’t see our caretakers often enough. We need constant attention and a feeling that we are loved and special. We enjoy others entertaining us via music, funny hats and clothes and signage.
While I was out riding this weekend (I rode 2 hours on Saturday and meant to do 3 on Sunday, but I started too late and only got in 2 hours before the rain arrived, and I had other things to do), I looked back on my life and realized that I have always had a “crew” of sorts around me—I just didn’t acknowledge it. And I thought we all do, but we don’t always know it. After all, we are all here to help one another get the most out of life and endure what it throws at us. Funny how I am getting near the end of the book, “Sacred Journey of the Peaceful Warrior,” and it notes the same thing, only “teacher” instead of “crew.” I will stick with crew, because that is how I think about it.
I had thought crew were only the ones who do good things for you and intentionally take care of you, but it is much more than that. Crew includes people who mistreat you so you can learn that that is not how you want to live your life, or they are in a constant state of anger, even AT you, and you develop compassion for them and others that way. Crew includes those who tell you you CAN when you think you CAN’T. Crew is someone who won’t congratulate you on your accomplishments even as you congratulate them on theirs, because they remind you that everyone deserves to be buoyed up while pursuing a dream and certainly given real or virtual hugs when they achieve the goal. Crew is the person who tried to bring you down with false accusations that required you to bite your tongue so that you would learn in another situation that silence is sometimes the best reaction. Crew is the person who nearly told me I sucked at swimming but held his tongue and said I was doing pretty well for my experience level and gave me a few tips. Crew is some awesome fast people I know who sometimes would slow down their training to accommodate me. Crew is someone I barely know coming to fetch me and my bike with an unrepairable flat a couple of miles from home after being flagged down by her neighbor. Crew is a stranger getting the last 6 inches of tire onto my rim after another flat where I had failed to bring tire levers with me and my thumbs were both blistered. Crew is one of my college professors who made me sit for a unique final exam in statistics as punishment for either cutting or sleeping through many of his classes—I sat in front of him filling out the exam and completed it in 1.5 hours when we had 4 hours to do it. Crew is my junior high P.E. teacher who managed to get me to do my first cartwheel (in 7th grade), and lit a spark in me that eventually grew into where I am now. Crew is the people who body-surfed me up onto the stage at a corporate user conference because they said I “needed” to be up there dancing with the band. Crew is the person who told me I must be the shit for getting into Ironman Hawaii and doing 2 Ironman’s in the same year (I have gone on to do 4 doubles—one more coming up soon!). Crew is a person telling me I’m a self-centered, bipolar exhibitionist, because there may be some truth to it for me to consider. Crew is a person telling me to go ahead and yell at them because they understood my stress and frustration over not getting my custom bicycle when I had wanted it. Crew is a person delivering a brand new cassette to my house that I had hoped to have a week earlier. Crew is someone making fun of me and calling me slow in front of others that I took to be a serious comment and spurred me to train harder. Crew is someone telling me I should be “softer” at times and realizing that it couldn’t hurt. Crew are all the near strangers who held me while I cried after the death of my Dad for months. Crew is whoever got me back to my dorm room in college after way too much tequila. Crew is another athlete who was slowing down and I wanted to stop and chat with him, but him telling me to “keep going you are doing great” as I passed him. Crew is someone I knew but did not know would be in Kona the year I raced there and catching sight of me and cheering. Crew is all the people I know who have put up with my antics, thinking I am a tad out there, and yet offering me their friendship.
By the way, all the “you’s” above are truths about ME. Crew also includes my regular service providers who have listened to me over the course of one or many years as I continued pursuing this passion of mine and I sometimes forgot to listen to them talk about theirs. I felt so bad the last few months for not having time to do my usual cheerleading on Facebook for everyone who was training and racing or doing other wonderful things. Crew is cheerleaders, and there is nothing I can think of that gives me greater joy than to observe someone else doing the thing that gives them happiness. I love to shout, laugh, do silly things, wear attention-getting clothes (and bikes!) and be the person with the biggest smile on her face, but also give someone a sweaty hug or soft words of encouragement or knowing when they are having a bad patch in a race—whichever is needed at the time. I can’t wait to do that at Ironman Wisconsin in a few weeks.
I hope I am being good crew for the others in my life, and now I will try and name as many of my crew as possible!
Lee, Richard, Mona, Steve S., Susan W., Cindy, Mark, Clorinda, Caryn, Mike M., Laurie, Mike O., David B., Mike P., William, Jen, Nick M., Nick O., Wayne, Rick P., Rob, Kevin, Jostein, Stan, Ken, Ali, Deanna, Jeff H., Shelley, Patricia, Dino, Vicky, Steve C., Eric, Erik, Julie, Maurice, Jon, Larry, Brad, Morgan, Mike C., Jamie, Jamey, Marty, Brett, Commodore, Jeff R., Jason, Greg, Ian, Lee C., Rich D., Tom, Mike H., Brent, A.J., Mj, Al, Adam B., Adam Z., Matt, Amanda, Amy, Andy, Anne, Rich S., Anthony, Leah, Katie P., Katie J., Cathy, Cheryl, Dave B., Deirdre, Denise, DPR, Gary, Judy, Joe S., Kim, Kurt, Lisa, Louis, Mike L., Peter, Susan A., Trevor, Vince D., Derrick, Mike A., Bob, Linda, Dave V., Eddie, Joe B., Chris S., Jerny, Chris C., Patty, Darren, Lori, David G., Walt, Forrest, Regina, Brenda, John J., Carl, Frank, Lora, Tony, Harlan, Ino, Alex, Mary Jo, Judi, Mike L., Jim W., Marc, Tom Z., Cameron, Dr. K., Cal, Dr. P., Dr. V., Dr. A., Dr. B., Harold, Gailmarie, Jim M., Vladtko, Val, Dan, Chip, Vince A., Debbie, Pascal, Alex
If your name is not in the list above, please don’t be offended—it just means you are not on Facebook, in my email contacts or my cell phone, or I can’t remember right now. But I love you anyway!
Photos from Ultraman Canada
http://www.flickr.com/photos/crackheadfe/sets/72157624568512147/
Play the slideshow. It is FANTASTIC! Thanks again to my friend, crew member and pacer, Lee, for taking these and allowing me to share them!
Play the slideshow. It is FANTASTIC! Thanks again to my friend, crew member and pacer, Lee, for taking these and allowing me to share them!
My Happy Season Totals
This past Sunday was the official end of my 2009-2010 training and racing season. I've stopped posting my weekly totals here because, well, it's boring, but I figure some people might be interested in what I did overall, so here goes!
A couple of things to note: If you add the walking/hiking time to overall, I hit 800.02 hours total ;) I was actually hell bent last week to get that total to 800, being OCD and all. That was the most running I've ever done in a season, and close to the most swimming I've ever done in a season (my most was 2003-2004, but I got faster since then). That was not the most biking I've done, but that's OK, I could go back and figure out that from January-July it probably was. I cut back on my biking from September-December last year at the expense (and for good reason) of swimming and running.
It's funny to look at how much I'd originally planned, and what I actually hit. I now know that I about top out between 750-800 hours of training in a year. I just can't put in more than that while working fulltime and having some semblance of a life. So I do the best I can on that volume. Truly, I love training so much that if I worked part time I expect I might go up to 850 or so, but as the years go on, I expect that as long as my performance is reasonable in races, I won't feel compelled to stretch it.
Now for the weekly averages:
Things to note: My average swim yardage is right around 10km! Which is what one would expect, right? Since I'm not a lifelong swimmer, I know from the past that I do best when I am at about 10,000 yards per week, just for Ironman, but when it comes to swimming, more is more. It is tough to hurt yourself swimming a lot (provided you do what I did and build up your core and upper back/shoulders to be bullet proof), and besides, the aerobic conditioning you get from it is unsurpassed! I really believe that I was able to ramp up everything because of this. Plus if you think about doing an Ultraman, you find that you will need to ingest nutrition during the swim, and I just got super precision about my calorie intake in training, because if I wasn't always replacing what I burned, I would be dead in a ditch from glycogen depletion!
I can't believe I stretched that much! But again, during this cycle, I stretched whenever I had time, like in the sauna after swimming, waiting in line at the grocery store, dentist or doctor(I didn't track that time, though), and then I had my daily post-work stretching/yoga/trigger point work and a beer time. I spent more time stretching my upper body than in years past because of all the swimming.
The running is actually a little more because of the walking/hiking which isn't included in the weekly averages.
Again, the biking is less than years past because I cut way back last fall/early winter.
All told, though, my average total weekly hours was the highest ever, same for stretching, running, swimming, and...SLEEP! You can see why I had no social life, right? But it was all worth it, and I'm ready to do it again.
Since my A race for 2011 is Ultraman Hawaii, I have many months in which to do not much if I so choose. I really don't need to start training until January, but it is still summer and so I will bike as much as I feel like because I love it, do modest amounts of swimming, and get in some good running. My plan is to do a full NothingMan in 4 weeks (yikes guess I should start training, huh?), and then run the marathon at CheaterMan (Ironman Florida). So that will be another couple of marathons (I don't plan on doing any 50-milers at this point, but who knows?), and then I'm thinking about Gasparilla in February next year instead of the more expensive Goofy Challenge. That should set me up for my run block (and of course, I will do the local indoor triathlons), and then I will either find some local-ish cheaper 1/2 IM's or just do fucking NothingMan's on my own. Part of what got to me mentally this time around was not racing between early March and end of July. Ironman Sado is in September, which is great timing, and I will do it as a training race (as someone pointed out to me, now "Ironman is for breakfast!"), be able to recover and then head to Kona in November.
I hope to get a bit faster on the swim and run, but I think that will come more from just my body having been exposed to what I did over the last year. I pretty much just don't want to slow down, you know? For the 10 years that I have been doing triathlon, I have accumulated about 7400 total training hours. Some sources say the magic number is 10,000 when you can really be a champion. Who knows? Maybe I will still pursue that qualification for Ironman Hawaii, but for now, it's
ULTRA, BABY!!!
and oh I just registered for Gasparilla Michelob Ultra Challenge!!! I've already updated my race plans on the sidebar ;)
| Season Totals | 08/31/2009-08/07/2010 |
| Swim: | 563375 yards (319.74 miles) in 193.64 hours Planned Yards: 626664 Hours: 226.29 |
| Bike: | Approx. 5305.12 miles in 290.86 hours Planned Hours: 351.22 |
| Run: | Approx. 1453.54 miles in 227.01 hours Planned Hours: 248.51 |
| Strength: | 70.19 hours Planned Hours: 55.64 |
| All Sports: | Approx. 7078.4 miles in 781.7 hours; approx. 343064 calories burned Planned Hours: 881.66 |
| Walking/Hiking: | Approx. 75.51 miles in 18.32 hours |
| Stretching: | 125.13 hours. Massage: 42.05 hours |
A couple of things to note: If you add the walking/hiking time to overall, I hit 800.02 hours total ;) I was actually hell bent last week to get that total to 800, being OCD and all. That was the most running I've ever done in a season, and close to the most swimming I've ever done in a season (my most was 2003-2004, but I got faster since then). That was not the most biking I've done, but that's OK, I could go back and figure out that from January-July it probably was. I cut back on my biking from September-December last year at the expense (and for good reason) of swimming and running.
It's funny to look at how much I'd originally planned, and what I actually hit. I now know that I about top out between 750-800 hours of training in a year. I just can't put in more than that while working fulltime and having some semblance of a life. So I do the best I can on that volume. Truly, I love training so much that if I worked part time I expect I might go up to 850 or so, but as the years go on, I expect that as long as my performance is reasonable in races, I won't feel compelled to stretch it.
Now for the weekly averages:
| Season Weekly Averages | 08/31/2009-08/07/2010 |
| Swim: | 11497 yards (6.52 miles) in 3.95 hours |
| Bike: | Approx. 108.27 miles in 5.94 hours |
| Run: | Approx. 29.66 miles in 4.63 hours |
| Strength: | 1.43 hours |
| All Sports: | Approx. 144.46 miles in 15.95 hours |
| Sleep: | 9.13 hours avg./night |
| Stretching: | 2.55 hours avg./week. Massage: 0.86 hours avg./week |
Things to note: My average swim yardage is right around 10km! Which is what one would expect, right? Since I'm not a lifelong swimmer, I know from the past that I do best when I am at about 10,000 yards per week, just for Ironman, but when it comes to swimming, more is more. It is tough to hurt yourself swimming a lot (provided you do what I did and build up your core and upper back/shoulders to be bullet proof), and besides, the aerobic conditioning you get from it is unsurpassed! I really believe that I was able to ramp up everything because of this. Plus if you think about doing an Ultraman, you find that you will need to ingest nutrition during the swim, and I just got super precision about my calorie intake in training, because if I wasn't always replacing what I burned, I would be dead in a ditch from glycogen depletion!
I can't believe I stretched that much! But again, during this cycle, I stretched whenever I had time, like in the sauna after swimming, waiting in line at the grocery store, dentist or doctor(I didn't track that time, though), and then I had my daily post-work stretching/yoga/trigger point work and a beer time. I spent more time stretching my upper body than in years past because of all the swimming.
The running is actually a little more because of the walking/hiking which isn't included in the weekly averages.
Again, the biking is less than years past because I cut way back last fall/early winter.
All told, though, my average total weekly hours was the highest ever, same for stretching, running, swimming, and...SLEEP! You can see why I had no social life, right? But it was all worth it, and I'm ready to do it again.
Since my A race for 2011 is Ultraman Hawaii, I have many months in which to do not much if I so choose. I really don't need to start training until January, but it is still summer and so I will bike as much as I feel like because I love it, do modest amounts of swimming, and get in some good running. My plan is to do a full NothingMan in 4 weeks (yikes guess I should start training, huh?), and then run the marathon at CheaterMan (Ironman Florida). So that will be another couple of marathons (I don't plan on doing any 50-milers at this point, but who knows?), and then I'm thinking about Gasparilla in February next year instead of the more expensive Goofy Challenge. That should set me up for my run block (and of course, I will do the local indoor triathlons), and then I will either find some local-ish cheaper 1/2 IM's or just do fucking NothingMan's on my own. Part of what got to me mentally this time around was not racing between early March and end of July. Ironman Sado is in September, which is great timing, and I will do it as a training race (as someone pointed out to me, now "Ironman is for breakfast!"), be able to recover and then head to Kona in November.
I hope to get a bit faster on the swim and run, but I think that will come more from just my body having been exposed to what I did over the last year. I pretty much just don't want to slow down, you know? For the 10 years that I have been doing triathlon, I have accumulated about 7400 total training hours. Some sources say the magic number is 10,000 when you can really be a champion. Who knows? Maybe I will still pursue that qualification for Ironman Hawaii, but for now, it's
ULTRA, BABY!!!
and oh I just registered for Gasparilla Michelob Ultra Challenge!!! I've already updated my race plans on the sidebar ;)
Sunday, August 08, 2010
WOW!!!
I have pages and pages of notes about UMC that I will get around to writing up, but I still need time to just savor in the good feelings. Besides, despite not having a bunch of training to do this weekend, it seems I have a million things to do, not the least of which is putting away all the crap (after doing laundry) I took with me, and s-l-o-w-l-y reassembling Skull Kingdom (the bars are back on and this afternoon I'll put the cages back on behind the seat post).
Backup: Don't think I ever posted a pic of Skull Kingdom here, so finally I am putting one here.
I managed to cook up a bunch of meat last night--chicken, steak and turkey burgers--that should last me through the week. I tend to eat a lot of protein right after these big events (and while training, I guess), and since I won't be training so much for awhile (famous last words, I know!), the protein will keep my mind off of constant snacks and the items which are currently banned from my cupboard: Twinkies, candy and Pepperidge Farm cookies. There is a Pepperidge Farm factory about 1.5 miles from my house, and on the right day, I can ride right by it and smell whatever they are baking. When it's something with cinnamon, it makes me nuts! These are my current favorite cookies of theirs. I looked at them yesterday in the grocery store, and somehow was able to resist their sweet pull.
Lee left me with a whole bunch of snacks from Japan, and I wolfed down a bunch of them Wednesday and Thursday, when I was still allowing myself to indulge a little bit. I have a Black Thunder Bar that I will eat today because I plan on riding maybe 3 hours, but the rest of the stuff, some of it I am not sure whether I am supposed to eat it or do something else with it! I will have to ask her, but I won't even be able to say what is on the labels!
Speaking of training, on Friday morning I went and swam. I purposely slacked on the time I got to the pool so I wouldn't do something silly like swim 3,000 yards. Besides, I am in a chatty, social mood right now, so I figured that if I swam 1/2 hour it would be good enough. When I first started, I felt like a brick, but after 300 yards, it felt great. You know what? I really like swimming. It is so quiet in the water, my body is gently supported, gliding along feels wonderful. It's funny that I was swimming sets of 1500's and 2000's just a few weeks ago, right? 500 feels like nothing. Surprisingly, my speed picked up as I went, and I even tried "racing" a guy next to me, but when I really tried to pick it up, my body told me that I'm recovering and should take it easy. He probably thought I suck, but hey, I don't care what anyone thinks!
Yesterday I woke up at 3:30AM, because my internal clock is messed up. I had slept what I thought enough, but I should have stayed in for more, but I was awake. I laid in bed for another hour and then got up and started doing things. By 7AM I was back at the pool, and put in an easy 2,000 yards. I could have done more, but I had to jabber. I wore my swim cap from UMC just like yesterday. I don't usually wear my race caps to the pool, but this is a bit different for me. Maybe it seems obnoxious, but for now I am basking in the good feelings I have and a slight sense of pride. I know--pride is one of the 7 deadly sins, but I never said I wasn't a sinner!
About 1.5 hours later I got on LGL to go for a 2-hour ride. I figured that would be the most I should ride, and if it was less, fine. Not like I NEEDED to go for a ride. But I have to tell you, it felt FANTASTIC!!! Almost like I had extra power in my legs! That is the beauty of doing big things--it gives you such a fitness boost that even if you went slowly (and I didn't ride hard at all in UMC--that would have been a poor strategy for a first-timer--except for on Day 2 the last 30K where we were going downhill with a tailwind), within 1 or 2 weeks you can feel the "pop."
I wore the black/white pirate singlet that I wore last year during IMLP, and I think I had the biggest smile on my face the whole way, because everyone was smiling back at me (maybe because I wore low cut DSS shorts and my muffin top was hanging out). While I can't say it's hilly near home for biking (although they are good for running), I stood up on the ups and was loving it. When I finished, I could feel my left knee (the one with no ACL) was a bit sore, so I stored that information up.
I had to go grocery shopping, then cook, grabbed a few parts from the garage for Skull Kingdom, did some stretching while cooking, finished eating my salad while cooking, then did a bit more stretching before finally sitting down to eat. I was in bed at 7:30PM and read for about 1/2 hour (still working on "Secrets of the Peaceful Warrior" and it's still excellent) before crashing. I slept 10 hours last night and it was sorely needed. I will try and do the same tonight.
This morning I am going to head out on Bitchie!!! It will be odd to ride her as the position is so different from Skull Kingdom, but I do love her. Once I get Skull Kingdom put back together (maybe tonight), I am going to give LGL, SK and Bitchie all good cleanings and get a photo of them all together. I am so blessed to have 3 beautiful, awesome bikes. Nothing against Clipless Fuck, but she needs to be cleaned up, too, since I do like trail riding in the fall, and she's been in the garage without that rear tire changed for several months! I know, I know--BAD bike owner. CF is a pretty nice bike, too. I never thought I'd have 4 nice bikes, and I do like riding them all!
Depending on how I feel, I want to ride about 3 hours today. I'm not training, but I can't run just yet, and it's still summer, so why not? I do want to ride Bike Psychos 200k, which is on August 29, and it's a nice, mostly flat ride (my definition of "flat" includes rolling hills) that I can knock out in 7 hours. It will be nice to have a change in perspective that a 7-hour ride is really not that long, eh? And then I plan on going up to Ironman Wisconsin to cheer for everyone I know (and those I don't know) that is racing, and plan on riding some bike (I haven't decided which one yet) from the stick out to the loop, loop in reverse direction of the racers so I can see them and they can see me (I'm told I'm quite popular out there) then back on the stick ahead of the race so I can put the bike away and get out on the run course. Geez, by that time I could probably run the marathon, right?
So today I'm thinking about some of my fellow UMC finishers are doing an Ironman soon, and I feel like I should be doing one. As it turns out, Ironman Cozumel still has spots available, at least according to Active.com. That would be a nice race to do, and would qualify as my "beach vacation" that I think I need. Or, I could just do a NothingMan, which I traditionally do the weekend after Ironman Wisconsin. It just feels like such a waste to me to have only done one long-distance race this year, when for the last 3 years I have done 2 Ironman's. OK so I just did more than 2 at once, but it was just one race, right?
I remember several years ago telling a close friend that I was going to retire from long-distance training/racing, and he assured me I was lying. I said the same thing before UMC that I was going to take time after the race to ponder the next year and probably not do anything long. There have been a few people who told me that they KNEW I would want to do Ultraman Hawaii if I finished UMC. Um...they were right!
As long as I find some more money, I am going to apply for entry to Ultraman Hawaii 2011. Lee is going to be on my crew as Captain, and I am looking for 2 others. The gig is the same as I described it before, only this time I can't cover land expenses (hotel/condo/food) for crew. I will still pick up all the supplies for during the race and take care of the crew as is customary, but the plan is to find and rent a large condo that will be split amongst the occupants. I plan on staying after the race for 4-5 days, too. Race information is here. I don't see the 2011 dates posted yet, but it is always the weekend of Thanksgiving.
Remember how I used to go to Kona on vacation every year for a long time? The last time I went on "just vacation" was in 2003, and at that time I decided that it was too expensive for me to make that trip and also fund my Ironman habit. So I decided that I would not go again until I qualified for Ironman Hawaii. And then the universe smiled on me and I got a lottery slot for Hawaii in 2004 (same year I did Ironman Canada). And then I told myself I would not go back again until I qualified, nor would I enter the lottery again. So, WOW, I didn't qualify for Ironman Hawaii--I qualified for ULTRAMAN Hawaii!!! Isn't that just fucking awesome?
If you were reading my sparse posts here over the last 6 months, you know how much I was struggling in my head about UMC to manage the training--how much, was it enough--and then I had that injury--but when I got on my way to Penticton, the stress began melting away, replaced with a new stress of getting the crew and provisions all set up, only that was quite manageable as we had all done a lot of planning beforehand. And then finally starting the race itself felt like an ugly coat that had been suffocating me for many months had fallen off--like a snake shedding its skin--replaced by fresh, new skin--and a constant migraine headache had been replaced by just the aura that comes with them--and I knew that everything I had gone through, including having no social life--was COMPLETELY WORTH IT! Most of the time while I was racing, I had this sense of it all being surreal, and there were definitely some out-of-body experiences. I kept feeling this confidence, that I had had before, rising up in me, only I didn't speak it aloud much except during the swim to Steve when he would ask me how I felt, and my response was, "This is all so surreal." I don't know if Ultraman Hawaii will feel the same way, but since I consider it my sacred place, I know those feelings will arise at some level. I remember during UMC on the rides and run that a number of times I read on the road, "WOW." That was the best thing anyone could write on the road, and I did have a sense of WOW the entire time. Not "Wow I am so fucking cool for doing this," but "WOW it is so fucking unbelievable that I GET to do this!" And also, "WOW I have this fantastic crew taking care of me while I GET to do this!"
And so I will stop writing for today leaving you with just WOW. Everyone should have as much WOW in their life as possible. Sometimes WOW is serendipitous--coming upon a beautiful vision--but creating your own WOW is even better. I am beginning to listen to a pile of CD's that Lee cut for me, and listening to WOW!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
