Here's what happened last week:
If you look at the weekly average of 16.6 hours and assume I will take off a full week (LOL like I have ever done that in the last 15 years), so multiply by 51 that's an 847 hour training year. The fuck (TF (tm)--I've stopped using the W or What since it's a WOT (Waste Of Time)). It's not like Joanna is pushing me that much farther than I would have pushed myself in terms of volume--my version of ATP had me at even more (and I bet she matches it hour for hour!!!)--it's just a matter of where/when the time comes. Make no bones about it--I am getting in some serious quality time--this is not all LSD shit.
FYI, when I get to a point where I've been training a lot for awhile, my potty mouth gets even worse than usual. I am just in that mode now, if you don't like it--fuck off.
This week promises to be quite challenging. It includes 12.5 hours of biking, if I get it all in. Even if all of it was LSD, that is still a lot of fucking biking. Not like I am taking off from swimming (although only 2 swims this week) or running (um...5.5 hours), so this is aggressive, hardcore fucking training. Let's fucking see how many fucking times I can say fucking in one fucking sentence. OK, that was probably not a PR--I'll work on it!
That's all I have time to write. I am sure a few people are still in a bit of shock after my last post--you know it's OK to ask me about my life and what happened to me. I have never felt like I shouldn't talk about it--it's just that while people seem OK asking about someone's illness or other misfortune, talking about violence is difficult. For me, too. But it's in the sharing of the good and the bad that we help one another, right? One question I'm sure some people have is do I ever channel that energy I had during a race? The answer is NO. I do have an extreme amount of mental toughness, I think, but I know that channeling anything negative is a huge WOT for me, and is not conducive to a flow experience. Anger is an emotion that is best utilized in the moment of its experience and then let go. I work very hard to not be an angry person, as I have some very good poor examples in my family!
On that note, time to go run, and have a wonderful week!
2 comments:
K well since you seem good with the questions and all, I mean to ask...
Are you married/Significant other/Attachment? Any issues with attachment/relationships come from such a traumatic experience? If so, did/do those issues linger forever or do you 'get over them'? I use that phrase lightly.
I only ask cuz you seem like a pretty damn hawt hardcore cougar-ish like babe that if I wasn't married then I would have to come out and do a 'training ride' with some day ;) Just sayin'.... lol
On the other hand I'm not sure I could overlook your bad traits like measuing in Miles... I've got limits. :)
:)
Wow, a few questions there. I am not married--I was from 1986-1994. I am not currently in a relationship. I do not having lingering issues with men due to what happened 30 years ago. I may joke about being a Dominatrix, but I am not into that or anything kinky. Also no S&M despite my love of Nine Inch Nails. I have found that many men feel they need to compete with me on every level, a typical male dominance attitude. My ex-husband said I intimidated him. I get along quite well with men, maybe even better than I do with women, probably because of my overall attitude towards stuff--I am generally not as "girly emotional" as many women are. But sometimes people mistake that for me not being feminine which is just not true. I like flowers and romance and all that shit, too, although I don't paint my fingernails they fall apart from all the swimming ;)I am fiercely competitive, I do not take shit from anyone, I am really smart, so it can be off-putting to a lot of men even when they say they like "strong women." LOL. I don't suffer fools or lazy people. My ex-husband also told me he felt he could not live up to my standards. Duh. Recently, though, it's the competitive thing that seems to bite me most. I know many men are attracted to me, but it can be tough to see through the exterior and dig deep for the initimacy factor, and that is what I really want and seems hard to find. I've been burned many times, but it's my own damn fault. I've learned to catch myself falling into a pattern of "over giving" to a relationship, because I have a vast capacity to give, despite some people thinking I have "no time" for a relationship. When the right man comes along, I will know it, he will be OK with all of me, will want to know ALL of me and will not feel a need to compete with me--he will be very secure in himself and cherish what I have to offer, and we will share in one another's passions and accomplishments and achieve a high level of intimacy. Huh--just wrote a personals ad there, did I not?
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