I began writing something to Jen in response to the stress she experienced today while having her proposal evaluated, and then I thought, hey, this pertains to everyone, so here goes.
At the end of the day, it is YOU who controls how YOU feel about YOURSELF. If you think you did a great job at something in the work environment or some other arena, then even though those seeds of self-doubt creep in (we are all human, after all) when you don't receive 100% positive feedback on your efforts, you still have to go to bed at night feeling good about yourself. This is one of the biggest lessons I have learned from sport and general physical fitness. It helps you feel good about yourself in a way that you have 100% control over. See if you are strong and healthy and you know it, nobody else can take that away from you EVER. When you look in the mirror and see that strong, fit, healthy person, who is to take that away from you? And you can take that into any life situation, since clearly if you have the conviction to excel at sport, then you naturally apply that to any endeavor.
So if on a day at "work," you get criticized or your ideas are rejected or someone creates grief for you, does that mean when you look in that same mirror at the end of the day and see that same strong, fit, healthy person that all of a sudden that person sucks? Hell no. In the job and life arenas, we are always being evaluated and judged by others. It's the nature of the beast, and like it or not, part of the society we live in that demands that we be better than someone else or better at convincing others to accept our creative ideas.
Life is never as simple as a clock at the end of a race that says, "YOU WENT THIS FAST." Hey, that clock doesn't lie, it isn't passive-aggressive, it doesn't have a hidden agenda, it doesn't care who you are, who did their presentation or wave before you or after you or give you style points--it's just a freaking CLOCK! I suppose that's why I've always enjoyed being timed--it's such a pure experience, and you always know how you did. And then it's your choice whether you compare yourself against someone else's time on that same clock or whether you compare yourself against your own clock.
The motto of the Olympics is CITIUS, ALTIUS, FORTIUS--Faster, Higher, Stronger. If you can apply that in one area of your life, you've got it everywhere, regardless of how you are judged. Cultivate your strength in sport and resist those who try and bring you down in other arenas.
This is the concept behind Mind of Iron. Build a strong body and mind. Resist invaders! Use your strength to guide you in every aspect of your life. Speak the truth, know yourself, even toot your own horn when necessary to get what you need. But always come from that strong center that is infallible. It will carry you through so much more than just a race!
3 comments:
Thanks Sheila. Yup, all of that is something that I'm slowly coming to grasps with. Some bits better than others, and definitely a learning process *brought on* by my recent experiences and success in sport!
Definitely that feeling of power and control is something that is new and different. And still growing. :)
I love that about humanity. We, as humans, are never finished works. As long as we choose, we can constantly be growing, learning, accepting new ways to be and to exist. *As long as we choose....*
Good post Sheila.
The clock never lies. It is always neutral. It is up to each of us to interpret the date ourselves. In that we have the free will to choose to be positive about the results or be negative about it.
I learn that just b/c someone tell me I am wrong, it doesn't mean anything. This is that one's opinion. And he/she has the right to have that opinion. I have my own opinion too.
Sheila, I have to say I don't always "get" you but today I needed to read this post. Thanks for "getting" me on this one and helping me get through this day.
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